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[ from Marie F. in New Jersey ]

Summary of Learnings
       I am 67 years old and throughout my life I suffered with anxiety and occasional bouts of depression. I am a successful business woman with three graduate degrees and a type A personality. My entire life I was an overachiever going from one project to another without much enjoyment, living in the past and worrying needlessly about the future. I was successful but I was not happy. My obsessive and compulsive nature robbed me of living in the present and I was basically going through the motions without being conscious of my own life's circumstances. I started the program with an open mind but, contrary to all the scientific evidence I read, I did not expect significant changes. I am very happy to report that MBSR enriched my life and helped me to enjoy the here and now.

       My formal practice consists of a daily body scan, Yoga routine and a sitting meditation. At the beginning it was very difficult for me - I was restless and unable to steady my mind. During the body scan I did not feel anything and I was not capable of staying awake - during the first three weeks of the body scan I never went beyond my knees without falling asleep. Eventually it became easier and I actually, for the first time in my life, started to feel some sensations in my body and I no longer fall asleep.

       I have been practicing Yoga on and off for about ten years, however, because of MBSR I made a commitment to start my day with a short routine every morning. I no longer see it as a physical and frustrating challenge and I am actually looking forward to my morning ritual. That is a major difference from my early years when I compared myself to much younger Yogis and became discouraged because my body was unable and unwilling to execute perfect postures.

       I have become accustomed to sitting meditations twice a day - fifteen minutes in the morning and longer in the evening. I do guided meditations as well as just sitting and observing my breath. I now find it calming and enjoyable. My anxiety has nearly disappeared and I have not been depressed for a while. I do not worry about my children, my business or my future. I have become a nicer person - more accepting of others and myself. I have become more open minded and less judgmental. My life is the same, but my perception has changed.

       As for the informal practice - I go through my days paying attention to everything that is happening. I eat mindfully and I am losing weight. I try to avoid multitasking and I do not rush through the day trying to accomplish the impossible. Ironically, I accomplish just as much as I did in the past without the self-imposed stress and frustration I experienced before I started the MBSR.

       In all, I am very grateful that I completed the program and I will definitely continue to practice mindfulness and educate myself as much as possible to gain more benefits and to promote MBSR to my loved ones in the hope that they will also reap the benefits.

       Thank you!

- Marie

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