Letter - Ann A.

I can't say enough about the MBSR course and the profound impact that it's had on me! I am a busy wife and mother of four children ranging in ages fourteen down to age three. One of my four children has special needs academically speaking, and another one of my children has epilepsy. I also work full time and have a seasonal job in the winter in addition to my regular job. I find myself racing through a life that has taken on a momentum of its own. I have often thought and felt that I am simply going through the motions of daily life without really taking time to be aware, to enjoy, and to breathe. Before I know it, my children will be grown and will have moved on with their adult lives. I will have been in the zone of survival mode rather than "thrival" mode. I have started to make some necessary changes in order to be more mindful of my husband, children, and life. Some of the big "take aways" that I have learned from this course are as follows:

Live in the moment - be aware of each action or non-action in a simpler way. I can now better focus on the emotions, thoughts, and feelings of each day. I don't want to rush through life in a trance allowing the joy of life to pass me by.

Be aware of pleasant and unpleasant moments without always evaluating. This course has helped me to realize that I am extremely judgmental of myself, and sometimes of others. I am especially critical of myself and am overly concerned with what others' think or their opinions of me. I want to be everyone's friend and to get along with everyone - to have ultimate peace in every relationship. However, this is not realistic. I can be aware of sensations, thoughts, and feelings without assessing them and it's ok to just allow them and be aware without over evaluating them. There are many things over which I have no control, but I can allow myself to just experience moments for what they are.

Reflect on unpleasant moments after the fact and be aware of the sensations, thoughts, and feelings in my body without judgement. I can allow myself to feel and think as those come naturally. In the past, I have tried to make myself "be happy" and rush past unpleasant emotions without allowing myself to be ok with unpleasant emotions or thoughts. Using loving kindness and nurturing myself is also ok. I used to think that caring for myself was selfish, but now I have learned that I must be mindful of my body, my mind, and my spiritual needs in order to be in a good place so that I can care for those who depend upon me.

Stress isn't just a state of mind. It can be measured by experts, and it can be dangerous. There is a link between stress and disease. Too much stress causes our bodies to be full of corrosive hormones. My career is highly stressful, and when I come home there is also a lot of stress. I often feel the physical, mental, and emotional effects on my body. When I try to express what I am feeling, I have been accused of complaining or over exaggerating. However, these cries for help are valid. Many of the videos that we watched for this course helped to validate what I have been articulating for years. Mindful practices are helping me regulate the effects of stress and, if I continue to reduce my stress, this can positively impact my health in the future.

I will incorporate what I have learned in this class by:

Continuing with my formal and informal practice logs to ensure that I continue to practice mindfulness. I will mix up practices much like a person would mix up his or her workout routine - alternating between sitting meditations, body scans, yoga, lake and mountain meditations, etc. as my body needs.

Practicing deep breathing and guided breathing with my children. I have found deep breathing to be very helpful to curb my young kids' meltdowns, and to help me to refrain from verbally expressing my frustration when I need to be practicing loving gestures and kindness towards them.

- Ann A.